


Counting Sheep

by jaws_3



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Hayner is a Fool, M/M, Seifer's gang makes some appearances, and yelling, but that's about it, there's lots of swearing, this is just something cute and ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 20:04:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11767365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaws_3/pseuds/jaws_3
Summary: In which Hayner has really weird dreams regarding Seifer and begins to seriously contemplate taking up insomnia despite Olette's protests and explanations of "you can't just take up insomnia, Hayner, it's a medical condition."





	Counting Sheep

In which Hayner has really weird fucking dreams regarding Seifer and begins to seriously contemplate taking up insomnia despite Olette's protests and explanations of _you can't just take up insomnia, Hayner, it's a medical condition_.

 

> **It starts with Hayner dreaming that Seifer confesses his love for him,**

It’s the first time Hayner has ever received a love confession, and it's from Seifer, and he’s tangled in his bedsheets at three in the morning, fast asleep. It’s also the first time Hayner dreams of Seifer doing _anything_ besides breaking Hayner’s nose (or cursing Hayner out because of his awesome fighting skills) so he wakes a little disoriented (although that may have been in part due to his alarm dragging him rather abruptly from a deep sleep) and very, very baffled. When his brain properly catches up to the implications of his dream, Hayner suddenly goes very, very _red_ before giving a loud shout and falling from his bed with an indignant squawk.

He keeps to himself that day, trying to keep a low profile, since part of his brain stupidly believed that he had somehow become a prophet and that should he see Seifer, the boy would actually confess his love. But when he walks into a room containing Seifer and promptly goes, “Nope!” before spinning round and walking out, he kind of destroys that attempted image. Because, of course, Seifer would not take such impudence quietly. Of course Seifer would follow Hayner out of the classroom, shouting at him to come back. Of course Hayner would speed up, desperate to keep away, and then dance around any questioning the bully has when he finally catches up. Of _course._

It takes one of Seifer’s infamous thrashes and the vague threat of, “I’m getting sick of this ballet routine, Chickenwuss!” to get Hayner thinking straight again.

Of course there was no way Seifer was in love with him. 

 

> **which is followed by him giving Hayner flowers**

Hayner tells his group about this one. Albeit, accidentally. He's sprawled flat on his back in the Usual Spot, captured by the waning light of day, when his trio of friends enter. He greets them with, "Seifer gave me flowers." (His brand of flowers were several stems of lavender roped together but the thought was still the same).

Roxas nearly chokes, Pence resembles a fish, and Olette's eyes widen quite substantially. She's then the first one able to properly operate her mouth and manages a slow, "That's nice?"

Hayner is quick to explain, with scarlet cheeks and flailing arms, "No! Not like… not in real life! If that fucker ever gave me flowers I'd be sure he ate them! No, he… He gave them to me. In my dream."

Again, it's Olette who pipes up first, "You dreamt that Seifer gave you flowers."

"Unfortunately."

It’s here Roxas finally manages to get his mouth cooperating with the fast waters of his mind and asks, "Were they pretty?" Hayner's answer is lost within the loud shout that erupts from him first, along with the startled yelp and shrill laughter that comes when Hayner suddenly tackles his blond best friend.

 

> **then he has the nerve to kiss him**

It’s Hayner’s beloved gym class and he spends it grumbling about blond, pretty boys after this dream. The worst part for him had been that it hadn’t even been a _deep_ kiss! It was the type of kiss you would share with your first girlfriend at the age of 8 when just the thought of holding hands was enough to get you blushing! The crease in his brow deepens as he remembers the absolute “terribleness” (“‘Terribleness’ isn’t a word, Hayner.” “Shut up, Pence.”) of the kiss when Olette, who had been trailing the boy with an arm full of sports equipment, finally catches on and asks, “What did he do this time?”

“The bastard had the nerve to kiss me!" Hayner shouts in response, punctuating the word “kiss” with a rough toss of the soccer balls he had been carrying. Across the field, Seifer's class - with whom Hayner’s class shared gym period - took turns maneuvering a sadistic obstacle course dominating their half of the field.

"Was he any good?" Roxas questions upon hearing, which is, of course, totally what Hayner wants to think about as he is forced (“No one is making you watch him, Hayner.” “Shut up, Lettie.”) to watch the star of his dream these past few nights hurtle himself pristinely over said obstacle course.

So Hayner quickly hisses, ”No, he wasn't any good!" in a relatively subdued whisper, suddenly aware there wasn’t much stopping Seifer himself from overhearing them, "He was the worst kisser ever! It was worse than kissing Selphie in third grade!"

"Good, then?" Roxas interprets, a mischievous grin growing on his face. Hayner responds by going into a sulk, collapsing into a seated position on the grass.

"The best. No dream person has the right to be that good at kissing."

It's Olette who happens to glance over to the boy of topic, as the group laughs at their friend's so called 'misfortune', only to catch him staring back, a curiously irritated look on his face.

 

> **and hold his hand and bring him on a date!**

Hayner wakes blushing and flabbergasted from this dream. He vows, to himself, to keep it safe from the group, as it was simply _too_ embarrassing, but he breaks it himself not five minutes into them finally settling in at the beach.

"Apparently we're dating." he at least tries to growl but it comes out more like a whine. They’re crowded beneath a battered beach umbrella attempting to keep themselves safe from the sun. Unfortunately, their close proximity - forced as the umbrella is not the largest - negates any real cooling properties the umbrella would have provided. But, at least they’re safe from any rays Pence was worrying about that week.

"What makes you say that?" Olette hums, her head pillowed by Roxas' legs and her legs pillowed by Pence. Hayner himself is squished, with his legs drawn in, stuck between the edge of the shade provided and Pence's lounging figure. This composed position is promptly destroyed when he flails his body out in a slightly immature fit, "He tried to romance me!"

"Sounds romantic." Roxas chirps.

"Tremendously so." Pence adds.

Hayner shoves them both, "It was! That's the worst god damn part! He… held my hand and, and took me out..."

"Like, punching wise?" Olette interjects.

"No!" Hayner's whines, full blown now, "Date wise! We went for dinner. Who even does that? Who takes people out to dinner nowadays?"

"Apparently Seifer." Olette yawns, rolling over. It is here the non-flailing part of the group all silently agree it is much too hot to indulge their grumbling friend, offering no more auditory responses to his stifled ranting. It's hardly in them to offer Hayner any sort of back up when Seifer later saunters by and gives them a rather monotone insult.

"Why don't you just fuck off, Seifer?" Hayner spits at him, standing alone.

"Yeah," Roxas pipes in, "Hayner has a date to get ready for."

The group spends the next few minutes in a slightly panicked disarray as Hayner again pounces on Roxas. While this is going on, Seifer smoothly dodges the only causality ("Your Mom's poor umbrella. Destroyed in a fit of Hayner rage." "It's not my fault Roxas doesn't know when to shut the fuck up!"), forces the snarl that was growing on his face to simmer and marches off, the words, "I don't fucking care if Lamer has a date," replaying incessantly in his head.

 

> **he also sleeps on him**

Several days pass between dreams, leaving Hayner to blissfully believe the worst had past and it was nothing but calm, Seifer-free sailing ahead. Of course, this is when he dreams of their shared gym class and Seifer quietly napping on his shoulder.

"Someone who has dedicated a large fucking portion of their life to making mine a living hell has no right looking that serene." Hayner claims, violently tossing a basketball at Pence who deflects it more than catches it.

"I've always liked having people sleep on my shoulder." Olette muses quietly, picking up the tossed ball. She gives it a quick spin before taking a shot.

Seifer and his group spend this time dominating half the gym, taunting classmates into challenging them then preening when the challengers are defeated. Whatever group isn't hopelessly sprinting after the ball in a match against them send whispers in Hayner's direction, wondering why he hadn't started some ridiculous game to assert some sort of dominance. Seifer himself sends the dirty blond several peculiar glances.

"Would you like it if Fuu slept on your shoulder?" Hayner interrogates, snatching the ball as it bounces his way, Olette having made her shot and properly celebrated it.

"I wouldn't mind."

"You're brave then." Hayner grumbles. He attempts his shot and misses beautifully, inspiring Seifer to call a rather thoughtful insult his way. To everyone's shock and wonder, Hayner does not visibly react to this and instead maintains his cool and calls for the ball again, for  a retry. However, since he doesn't turn to the insult, he doesn't notice the ball flying his way and is forced to his knees by the misguided basketball.

Roxas is also greeted with a basketball. Although his isn't an accident. Hayner throws it at him to shut his laughter up.

 

> **introduces him to his parents**

Hayner blurts, "Your mother is beautiful," when he sees Seifer following this dream and while Seifer looks torn between blackening both of Hayner's eyes believing he means it as some sort of insult and awkwardly thanking him though he didn't know when Hayner _met_ his mother, Hayner scrambles away. Olette finds him trying to bury himself outside town twenty minutes later.

 

>   **takes him to the fair**

"Are you afraid of ferris wheels?" It's a ridiculous question that’s most likely to be met with a disbelieving stare and a quick fist, but it's one that had been plaguing Hayner since he had woken up. He had dreamt the two of them had gone to some country fair and when Hayner suggested them riding the ferris wheel, Seifer paled considerably and mumbled something about not wanting to waste his money on it. With him is only Pence, so they're a bit screwed if Seifer feels like starting a full on brawl. Hayner prays that he won't be too offended by the inquiry.

"What?" Although it seems like it is taking him a while to fully understand it. "What the fuck kind of question is that, Chickenwuss? No, I'm not scared of fucking ferris wheels."

Seifer's expression is one of max irritation so Hayner wonders if it's a bad time. Then he realizes they never really meet at a 'good' time, begins to wonder if they're ever be a 'good' time between them before deciding that withdrawing as soon as possible is the best option. He turns to Pence in order to do this, "Well, there you go. Sorry, Pence, seems like you really are one of the few who are scared of the terrifying ferris wheel."

Pence, bless his beautiful soul, decides to go along with this so Hayner mentally notes to buy him ice cream later. Shrugging, he gives an easy reply, "Oh well, I'm sure there's someone else. And even though I won't go on with you, I'm sure Olette or Roxas will, don't worry, Hayner."

Maybe Pence wasn't so beautiful. But Hayner wasn't about to let Seifer onto that so he grins, claps Pence on the shoulder and agrees before they both make a rash and hasty exit. When they later inform the other two of the meet and greet, Roxas freely admits that he would have probably said something along the lines of, "See, Hayner! I told you Seifer would be able to go on the ferris wheel with you!" so Hayner is quite happy he's only buying ice cream for Pence and Olette isn't buying ice for the black eyes they were sure to have gained had Roxas been there.

At the other end, Seifer is left bewildered, even more irritated, and with an expression resembling that of one who'd just been asked if they've ever been sexually involved with a number. He moves only when Fuu nudges him and fixes him with a look he doesn't care to directly respond to.

"That fucking Chickenwuss is getting stranger by the day."

"Worried," is Fuu's only inclination she's heard him and she then cuts off his weak attempt at denial with, " _Statement_."

  

> **kisses him again**

Hayner spends this morning swearing into his cereal. Then into his questionable mac 'n' cheese at lunch when Seifer pushes his way through the crowd milling about the section of tables surrounding Hayner.

"God, it's like he wants me to look at him."

"Seifer wants everyone to look at him."

Hayner hurls his mac 'n' cheese, that appeared too bleached to be healthy, at the sauntering blond in order to do just that.

 

> **and fucking dies in his arms**

Hayner wakes with a choking cry from this one. He refuses to update his friends on this dream, some insistent, superstitious part of his brain causing him to believe informing anyone might cause it to come true. Said trio of friends only venture for a playback of the dream twice before leaving their anxious friend to his head shakes and finger tapping.

Being more than a little freaked out, Hayner spends this day with Seifer in constant view. However, this incessant watch leaves his friends mumbling something about obsession, and Seifer getting fed up, snapping, "What the fuck do you _want_ , Chickenwuss? I know I'm everything you need in life, but, God, you're pissing me off."

He expects this to finally rile Hayner to the point of a battle but the boy instead just continues to stare. It's only when Seifer lunges forward to take Hayner up by the collar that he finally steps back and hastily states, "Don't die on me." before turning away and leaving an immensely stunned trio in his wake.

  

> **he saves his life**

"It's not so much the saving my life that's bothering me," Hayner begins to explain to the group following the run down on his latest dream (he had pissed off the wrong person and was inches from death when Seifer quite literally swooped in and rescued him. Hayner wasn't even sure swooping was possible before this), "It's how I reacted to the saving."

"You mean how you swooned?" Roxas grins.

"I did not swoon..!” Hayner's starts, his palms opening in order to arrange a meeting with Roxas' face at the dust ladened pillows they had stolen years ago for the couch cramped in their Usual Spot.

"No, you just fell into his arms with a blissful sigh and a, 'Oh, thank you, my Seifer! My once sullen and frightened heart now beats with a yearn-'" It's Olette who actually says this, but she's cut off when a pillow mysteriously collides with her face. She's then too busy coughing to clear her throat of the dust that had decided to try and make their home there, and laughing due to Hayner's obviously embarrassed reaction to continue, so Pence pipes in.

"It's all right, Hayner." he reassures him. "No one is going to think any less of you for swooning. It's a perfectly acceptable reaction."

Seifer, who had just happened to be strolling by, peers in at this, a sincere look of amazement on his face, "Chickenwuss swooned? Over who?"

The narrow alleyways of Twilight Town were soon filled with violent exclamations as a brawl breaks out, Hayner having finally decided on a target to tackle. It's well overdue, their altercation, and Seifer is more than pleased with it. Hayner is less so. He ends up, around thirty minutes later, with a few swollen knuckles, several darkening bruises on his face and arms, and a deep graze on his knee from his grapple with Seifer. The dream is put on the back burner until the group gets up to leave and Hayner winces from the pressure being exerted on his knee and Roxas decides this is the right time to chime in, "Too bad Seifer wasn't here to save you this time 'round."

Hayner then decides his time would be put to better use if he started strategizing revenge rather than racing after the laughing blond.     

 

> **says I love you**

Hayner’s heart beats too fast upon waking from this. He can hardly stomach toast at breakfast and lunch is more admired than eaten. Having already mumbled a, "Seifer told me he loved me." at his group that morning, they spend the day turning the words over in the minds as though they were apples being observed for bruising. It isn't until the night sky begins to tap at the waning afternoon light that Olette finally asks, "Why does this bother you?"

Hayner admits, in a muted voice after several seconds of silence, "Because I woke up wishing it was real."

 

> **jerks him off**

Almost a week passes between this dream and the last, and this is another dream Hayner hardly tells. Olette is forced to surmise the details from the squawks and changing hue of red painting his face. When the general plot of the dream is decoded, the group gives pity to the embarrassed mass on the floor and changes the subject. Later, Roxas stares at Seifer in contemplation when he and Pence run into the literal man of Hayner's dreams in the alleyway. He lets out a low hum before stating, "I can't see it."

Pence blanches a bit before muttering, eyes suddenly downcast, "I don't really want to."

Seifer just walks away from the both of them, having no energy to deal with the idiocy that seemed to be pouring from their group's mouths for the past month.

 

> **_proposes_ ** **to him**

"Maybe you're seeing the future!" Olette teases, the insistent buzz of cafeteria chatter protecting their conversation. Hayner knows she's referring to the confessions and kisses much too soft to be coming from the chapped and busted lips of his nemesis, but, the image of a battered Seifer fading in his arms is what immediately comes to mind and what inspires him to say,"I hope not." 

 

> **and even follows him to war**

"You followed Seifer to war?"

"No! Seifer followed me to war!"

"Why were you going off to war in the first place?"

"Does that really matter?"

"It does if you're genuinely considering running off into battle!"

Olette is the one to baffle the Almasy trio as she happens by them on her evening stroll home. "Please don't join the military.” is all she says, as brief and flippant as the common "Nice weather we're having." as they pass by one another. Seifer refuses to later admit his stressed exclamation of, "Why would you _care_?" 

 

> **but then he cheats on him**

Hayner quite literally attacks Seifer that day, the shattered feeling of betrayal still burning like acid in his mouth from waking. Seifer is standing in the middle of the hallway, smirking at some girl when Hayner lunges and sends him back, his lips suddenly being painted crimson.

"What the fuck is your problem!" Seifer snarls, wiping the blood from his lip with a hasty swipe from the back of his hand, before centring himself into a defensive stance.

Hayner falls into his own stance, instinctive and familiar, shouting, "You!" before throwing himself back at the other boy.

Both end up being sent home. Hayner trudges back to his house with a bleeding nose and black eye, the acid still hot his mouth. Seifer storms home with a busted lip and scratches, half-assed threats of violence spilling from his lips as he wonders aloud about the boy whose mood towards him was reshaping itself day by day.

 

> **before finally, he abandons him**

Hayner wakes _pissed_ from this dream. The betrayal that coils in his stomach sits with him differently than it did previously. He tries to hold onto the anger, but it dissipates quickly, leaving a strong sense of loss and pain which is what truly puts Hayner in a piss poor mood. It’s also what causes him to give Seifer a cold shoulder so frigid that even Roxas balks from commenting on it. (He does mumble, “Throw him in the ocean and he’d sink the Titanic.” to Olette in Math, safe, several seats away from the sulking boy.)

Seifer, whose patience was already being tried by the two months of bullshit Hayner had already put him through, lasts until Lunch before cornering Hayner outside the cafeteria, determined to figure out what the _fuck_ was wrong with him.

It takes some (read: a lot of) coercion (read: threats and Seifer roughly snatching Hayner up by his collar) for Hayner to finally give in, shouting, ”You left me!” in a tone that held more pain than he would have liked. Seifer just stares, blinking only once, before, " _What_?”

Hayner glowers at him before he begins to try and struggle his way out of Seifer’s hold, refusing to repeat himself. Seifer eventually lowers Hayner, which Hayner is grateful for, but he doesn’t release him, so now he has to tilt his head up to look the asshole in the eye which further pushes his irritation closer to its max level, and asks, “What do you mean I left you?"

Hayner takes this opportunity to shove Seifer back, desperate for some level of distance, growling, ”I mean you left me, you asshole! We were together in my dream and you had the fucking nerve to go and fucking abandon me, so obviously some unconscious part of my brain is telling me that you're a fucking bastard and I shouldn't waste my time on you!"

It takes Seifer a few minutes to properly process this. Hayner just stands there, cheeks flaring from both frustration, exertion, and from the embarrassment of actually being hurt by the whole ordeal. When the taller blond finally seems to comprehend the situation, he takes a step forward, one hand raised as if it could grasp the whole thing for him, which pushes Hayner into a small flinch and to take a step back, right into the wall that was currently trapping him.

"You dreamt we were together?" Seifer finally asks which elicits a scowl from Hayner. Of _course_ that’s what Seifer picked up on.

So, Hayner clarifies, ”I dreamt you _left_ me!"

"In order for me to leave you, Chickenwuss,” Seifer starts, a smirk beginning to form on his _stupid_ face, “I have to be with you in the first place."

Hayner can't argue that, so Seifer decides to push envelope just a bit more.

"Do you want us to be together? Is that why you've been acting so fucking weird lately?"

"I have not been acting weird, you fuck." It's a weak denial that has no proper footing so it crumbles pretty quickly.

"It’s fucking true."

"You're the one who was coming after me in my dreams, you asshole! I didn't ask for any of this!"

"So you have been dreaming about me!" Seifer’s way too pleased about this for Hayner’s liking so Hayner takes a swing at him. It actually catches the other off guard, but only for a moment and then Seifer’s face turns stormy and he grabs at both of Hayner’s wrists, pinning him to the wall. He opens his mouth to speak, but Hayner beats him to it.

"Fucking… Yes! Okay? Yes, I’ve been dreaming about you! I've dreamt that you've confessed to me and kissed me and actually fucking cared about me. I've dreamt that you've proposed to me in a fucking flurry of roses, I've dreamt that you freaking died in my arms! I've been dreaming about you for too fucking long and I'd like it to fucking stop because it's confusing as fucking hell to have the same man go from kissing you, to punching you, to fucking leaving you all in a span of 48 hours!" Hayner all but screeches, stumbling over half this speech.

At the very end, Seifer hardly has it in him to respond. The asshole. So, Hayner, breath coming in heavy huffs, gives a strangled cry and goes back to his escape attempt, desperate to put some space between them. (If he stood still for too long he could feel the heat beneath his eyes and like _hell_ he was going to cry in front of Seifer. Not after all this.) He almost succeeds, Seifer’s grip having loosened considerably throughout Hayner’s impromptu speech, when suddenly Seifer’s grip tightens and he’s pushing himself even further into Hayner’s personal space, his expression furious.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Chickenwuss?”

This time, it was Hayner’s turn to blink in confusion, “What?”

“Do you believe everything you dream?” Seifer growled out, pressing forward even more. Hayner weakly attempts to curse him out and free himself, but he still had no luck. Seifer isn’t really paying attention to that anyways. “If you’re going to hate me, Chickenwuss, I’d rather it be for something I’ve actually done.”

Which is entirely fair. Not that Hayner wants to admit anything Seifer said was _fair._ So he yells at him instead.

“Why do you fucking care!”

“Because I _care_ , Hayner! Because I might just like you as much as you like me, you idiot!”

It’s here Hayner’s struggling finally stops, here where Hayner finally, _finally_ , meets Seifer’s eyes, where he realizes that maybe, his first few dreams weren’t that far off after all… It’s also where Hayner hears a soft gasp that comes from neither of them and he glances to the side and realizes just where they are and just how _many people are watching them._

Seifer also takes a look around, but at least he has the sense to grab Hayner’s hand and yank him somewhere quieter. All Hayner’s brain had managed to provide in terms of a _plan_ was to gape, flush, and quickly start yelling at people things like, “What are you looking at?!”

In the end, Seifer’s true love confession is a lot less romantic that his dream counterpart’s, but it works just fine for Hayner, who wasn’t sure he could even handle Seifer paying off the school’s band to play for him as he half shouted, half sang an emotional love confession at the terrified blond. Seifer’s quiet insistence of, “I won’t ever leave you,” is much more realistic and, for Hayner, much more romantic anyways.

Hayner does find out, however, quite quickly, that when it came to kissing, Dream!Seifer really wasn’t that far off the mark.

“How is your mouth so fucking _soft_?!”

  

> **then, 87 days later where Hayner** **_totally_ ** **has this dream Seifer should make sure doesn't happen…**

"I had this dream where, you, like, didn't give me a back massage and man it was awful so you should probably…" Hayner's blatant and rather teasingly pathetic attempt at cornering Seifer into giving him a massage dissolves quickly into laughter when Seifer rolls himself on top of the conniving blond, and encourages his mouth to collide roughly with his own.

"Nice fucking try." Seifer mumbles after a brief kiss.

Hayner beams, "Thanks."

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this on my computer for hecking ages and suddenly had the desire to finish it today so here you go. the ending is a bit thrown together but I hope you like it well enough. if I ever feel like properly fixing it I'll let y'all know 
> 
> keeping the same tense is not my friend but my roomie helped me out with that
> 
> hmu on jaaaaaaaaaws on tumblr if u wanna talk Seiner pls I love these idiots so much


End file.
